Supposed to Do

I know that this had to end 
But every now and then 
I wish that we could try again 
I wish that we could try again 

Remember when we laid in bed 
And you held my hand 
You said you wished this’d never end 
You said you wished this’d never end 

And I did what I was supposed to do 
What I was supposed to do 
But I’m still without you 
But I’m still without you 

And I told the truth 
Like you asked me to 
But I’m still without you 
But I’m still without you 

D’you know when I look in your eyes 
I can see the sky 
Both beauty and my own demise 
Both beauty and my own demise 

With each message that you didn’t send 
Felt my heart crumbling 
But my love for you could never bend 
No my love for you could never bend 

And I did what I was supposed to do 
What I was supposed to do 
But I’m still without you 
Yeah I’m still without you 

And I told the truth 
Like you asked me to 
But I’m still without you 
But I’m still without you

Bad Intent

Strange, isn’t it, how well we get along 
We’re understood even when we’re wrong 
Funny, isn’t it, how separate we must be 
Hearts so close, but our bodies detached from reality 

I want you now 
No matter my bad intent 

It happened quick, a revelation of a certain kind 
This intensified beat inside your soul and mine 
It’s overwhelming, you can feel it too 
I’m not alone when I say I’m craving your truth 

I want you now 
No matter my bad intent 
I need you now 
But I know I can’t 

And I know that you know 
How good it could be 
And I know that you know 
How good it could be 

I want you now 
No matter my bad intent 
I need you now 
But I know I can’t

Run So Hard

Yeah I run so hard, run so hard 
Thought I’d chase the rain that plagued me from the start 
Yeah I run so hard, run so hard 
Down that dusty, dirty two-lane boulevard 

And you thought you had me back in Kalamazoo 
If I could take that train back yeah I know what I’d do 

I’d run so hard, run so hard 
In a million years I never thought it’d come this far 
Run so hard, run so hard 
I can see those eyes shining through the jailhouse bars 

And you thought you had me back in Kalamazoo 
If I could take that train back yeah I know what I’d do 

Can you justify the taking of another life 
Out here in the darkness it’s the only way you know to survive 

Walked up to your room, walked up to your room 
Saw the pale white face of the waning November moon 
Said I’ll be back here soon, I’ll be back here soon 
Before you see me coming you will hear that timeless tune

He Wants To

It started one sided 
On my side really 
Infatuation’s like listening without fully hearing 

So I picked what I wanted 
Ignored all the rest 
Why fuss over flaws when you can hide behind jest 

But it’s all worn thin, I’m tired of it now 
And I’m thinking of him less when he’s not a around 

He wants to make believe 
That I would never leave 

The tables have turned 
As one might say 
But I gotta ask if he ever even liked me anyway 

He can call me cold hearted 
I’ve been there before 
But being around him’s turned into a chore 

He’s a good, good man and I’m a wretched old girl 
He could do so much better in this beautiful world 

He wants to make believe 
That I would never leave 

He, yeah he wants to, wants to make, make believe 
He, yeah he wants to, wants to make, make believe 

He wants to make believe 
That I would never leave 

He wants to make believe 
That I would never leave

Bittersweet Love

Slowly I emerge 
With cloudy eyes 
Like breaking the surface 
Where the ocean meets the sky 

I saw him clear 
As the moon at night 
But only an outline remains 
In the morning light 

It’s as though your face 
Sinks deep within 
Leaving my heart heavy 
And aching for you, my friend 

Oh, how beautiful that ache 
Descending on me from above 
Like a ripe fruit my heart 
Drips with bittersweet love 
Drips with bittersweet love 

My head is filled 
With the softest words 
I want to sing you 
The prettiest song you’ve ever heard 

But I’m helpless my dear 
There’s little to do 
But use these simple words 
I miss you 

It’s as though your face 
Sinks deep within 
Leaving my heart heavy 
And aching for you, my friend 

Oh, how beautiful that ache 
Descending on me from above 
Like a ripe fruit my heart 
Drips with bittersweet love 
Drips with bittersweet love

Holding On

It’s been a long, long time since I walked this way 
And my mind it ain’t worked since yesterday 
But I can’t get him out of my head 

I can see him standing there all alone 
With his dark hair, light eyes and man he’s grown 
On me, he’s grown on me 

And my heart slides down to the soles of my shoes 
Each step pumps a beat of these terrible blues 
Cuz he’s gone, he’s gone 
For some goddamn reason, I just gotta keep holding on 

He stood next to me as I watched them play 
Some band that claimed they came from East LA 
And he laughed as the lights came on 

I remember his hands as they reached for me 
They swallowed up my fingers to easily 
And he led me through the crowd 

And my heart slides down to the soles of my shoes 
Each step pumps a beat of these terrible blues 
Cuz he’s gone, he’s gone 
For some goddamn reason, I just gotta keep holding on 

After all we’ve said and after all we’ve done 
I’m sitting here wishing that the rain don’t come 
And wash it all away 

Because the trees they bend and the sea it flows 
But I’d wait a thousand years if you please don’t go 
Away, don’t go away 

Yea, my heart slides down to the soles of my shoes 
Each step pumps a beat of these terrible blues 
But he’s gone, he’s gone 
For some goddamn reason, I just gotta keep holding on 
Yea, for some goddamn reason, I just gotta keep holding on

Shame

A small incision made on the surface of my consciousness 
Allowed a leak of some toxic poison I can’t resist and 
It settles deep inside my bones I can’t get rid of it and 
It works its way out through my mouth I try to swallow it and 

Shame is a feeling I’m not very unfamiliar with 
It drapes itself across me more than I’d like to admit and 
It’s hard to see when it throws shade on my accomplishments 
When will I, oh when will I grow out of it 

Down this slope I slip and struggle to control myself 
I feel the weight of it, yeah I’m worrying about my health and 
Nothing seems to matter all those feelings that I felt and 
Like ice my sense of purpose it all seems to melt and 

Shame is a feeling I’m not very unfamiliar with 
It drapes itself across me more than I’d like to admit and 
It’s hard to see when it throws shade on my accomplishments 
When will I, oh when will I grow out of it 

My foot has taken up permanent residence inside my mouth 
All I know about myself is now called into doubt and 
I can’t even feel comfortable inside my own house and 
Apparently good judgment is something I can live without 

Shame is a feeling I’m not very unfamiliar with 
It drapes itself across me more than I’d like to admit and 
It’s hard to see when it throws shade on my accomplishments 
When will I, oh when will I grow out of it

Heavy as Lead

He left with my mind last week, 
Reached right in and took it to keep 
And he turned on his heel before looking at me 
And said “babe no it’s too late to weep” 

Now this gap in my head it keeps growing 
All this shelter can’t keep me from knowing 
That those words were true that he told me 
No, there’s nothing more unfolding 

And it’s gone from my heart, like my mind from my head 
And I could say a lot but I think it’s all said 
You never saw me the way that I am and as I sit here I feel 
Heavy as lead 

I remember that summer I knew you 
Everyday I got closer and we knew 
That I’d fallen in love with a version of you 
That had grown from a vision I’d had back at school 

Yeah and Levon filled my ears that day 
Crying out that the poor farmer had died in a way 
So noble and true to return to the land 
I could feel the warmth in the palm of my hand 

And it’s gone from my heart, like my mind from my head 
And I could say a lot but I think it’s all said 
You never saw me the way that I am and as I sit here I feel 
Heavy as lead

Standing on the shoulders of giants of old
Makes this a trying balancing act
And I can’t hold myself up now I’m tumbling, trying to be bold
And I gotta pick myself up at the place that I have rolled

Loving you never really seemed to me 
To be anything other than the opposite of apathy 
And now as I watch you leaving me with my mind in tow 
I just can’t let it be 

And it’s gone from my heart, like my mind from my head 
And I could say a lot but I think it’s all said 
You never saw me the way that I am and as I sit here I feel 
Heavy as lead

Already Won

As a fiery red sun sets, we brush our fingers through the grass 
What once was dewey now is dry, now the day has come and passed
“It’s peaceful here” you whisper, through the growing chirp of crickets 
As I nod in acquiescence, the brittle grass makes me fidget 

I gave you all I could allow 
You’re draining all of my willpower 
I’m gonna leave you now 

I think back to older days and a strain burns through my heart 
It seems to be a lifetime ago, but still has power to tear me apart 
So silently I beg of you, to understand what’s been done 
But I grip your hand as I realize, this war is already won 

I gave you all I could allow 
You’re draining all of my willpower 
I’m gonna leave you now 

I gave you all I could allow 
You’re draining all of my willpower 
I’m gonna leave you now

It's Up to You

It’s up to you, I hate that phrase 
it’s lazy and a crutch you’ve used these days 

It’s up you to figure out the place 
Where we’ll eat dinner and talk face to face 

It’s up to you to pick what we hear 
You haven’t cared about music in a year 

It’s up to you where we walk to now 
If you could I know you’d walk right out of town 

It’s up to you to pick the movie we see 
You sit so close but feel so far away from me 

It’s up to you to pick our bed’s quilt 
The blanket to cover this home that we’ve built 

And it’s up to you to decide when we go 
It’s been four long years and there’s not much to show 

Now I know it’s up to me to make a new start 
To pick myself up and brush off the pieces of my very own, my very broken heart 

Now I know it’s up to me to make a new start 
To brush myself off and pick up the pieces of my very own, my very broken heart

I Must Say

They say the only thing we know 
Is we don’t know anything 
We could all be figments 
It’s a funny thing 

I could have made you up 
Your face, your laugh, your hands 
What seems out of my control 
Could be in my command 

And if that’s the case 
And my darling it may 
What a lovely imagination 
I have I must say 

The way you act so cool 
And wear the crown 
Might in fact be 
The other way around 

If I made up those lips 
That push into mine 
I’d admit in a second 
That’d be just fine 

And if that’s the case 
And my darling it may 
What a lovely imagination 
I have I must say 

It’s cliché to say 
You’re too good to be true 
But with love like yours 
What can I do 

And if that’s the case 
And my darling it may 
What a lovely imagination 
I have I must say 

And if that’s the case 
And my darling it may 
What a lovely imagination 
I have I must say

I Don't Live Here Anymore

Rollin’ down this road 
Pull my hat way down low 
Shield my eyes from the sun 
Filtered through my closed window 
And I get this eerie feeling 
So familiar to me know 
It finds its way beneath my skin 
And it lingers there somehow 
And no, I don’t live here anymore 
No, no I don’t live here anymore 

Foreign to me all those years 
That place is home away from here 
Yellowed are my thoughts of you 
Yeah they’re stale and dry and far and few 
And the fibers seem to dissipate 
As I find a way to separate 
My thoughts for you and our clear fate 
No I don’t feel love or even hate 
And no, I don’t live here anymore 
No, no I don’t live here anymore 

Hope is a privilege I don’t deserve 
Wishing for you would only serve 
To deepen the divide you see 
I know there’s nothing left for me 
But your eyes will remain 
A dull etching on my brain 
And no, I don’t live here anymore 
No, no I don’t live here anymore

Lofticries (Originally by Purity Ring)

Green, green thunder and the 
Loud, loud rain 
Lead our woes asunder 
'Neath the proud, proud veins 

Of trains let bleed the gunmen of our 
Pumping earthly hearts 
Wean or joys and plunder 
Peel our shining teeth 
Bid our hold on happiness 

Beat weighty tests with lofty cries 
Lofty cries with trembling thighs 
Weepy chests with weepy sighs 
Weepy skin with trembling thighs 

You must be hovering over yourself 
Watching us drip on each other's sides 
Dear brother, collect all the liquids off of the floor 
Use your oily fingers 
Make a paste, let it form 

Let it seep through your sockets and ears 
Into your precious, ruptured skull 
Let it seep, let it keep you from us 
Patiently heal you 
Patiently unreel you 

Beat weighty tests with lofty cries 
Lofty cries with trembling thighs 
Weepy chests with weepy sighs 
Weepy skin with trembling thighs 

You must be hovering over yourself 
Watching us drip on each other's sides 
Dear brother, collect all the liquids off of the floor 
Use your oily fingers 
Pick up paste, let it form 

Beat weighty tests with lofty cries 
Lofty cries with trembling thighs 
Weepy chests with weepy sighs 
Weepy skin with trembling thighs 

You must be hovering over yourself 
Watching us drip on each other's sides 
Dear brother, collect all the liquids off of the floor 
Use your oily fingers 
Pick up paste, let it form

Love's a Bitch

Is it a choice to let you go? 
I asked myself so quietly 
When free will seems impossible May I please blame fate entirely? 

It’s not that I didn’t care for him 
You know after all that time 
But sometimes feelings lose their grip Like a knot that’s come untied 

It was raining when I told him That our love had all dried up 
He hung his head and wiped a tear And said I never gave a fuck 

Anger, pleading and heavy sobs 
I endured the whole affair Though I tried I just couldn’t cry 
Maybe I really didn’t care 

Love’s a bitch, but so am I 
And I know I’ll be just fine 
I’m on to the next one, break up and all It’s only a matter of time 

Is it a choice to let you go? 
I asked myself so quietly 
When free will seems impossible May I please blame fate entirely?

Turn Your Head

Moving through the crowd I walk on eggshells 
I can spot him laughing as somebody yells 
And he tilts his head back at some old joke that Colin told 
And I could have sworn he never would have showed 

So I stop down by the bar and grab my drink 
Yeah I need some fuel to help me sit and think 
But all I can remember is what I used to have 
And babe I want to turn your head so bad 

I want to turn your head so bad 
It’s funny how a man can make you weak 
With one look it’s like I forgot how to breath 
And I can’t believe I’m aching up inside 
And thinking man I want him back in my life 

And he knows exactly how he makes me feel 
It’s like a skip on some old rusty movie reel 
And with each go round I fall a little bit harder 
Yeah I’d like to think I got a little bit smarter 
But I want to turn your head so bad 

So that whiskey warms me down to my bones 
With this confidence I could never be alone 
But I’m staring at myself across bar 
And all I see’s a girl who’s gone too fucking far 

And I dream of busting into that place 
With high heels and some makeup on my face 
But I grip my stool as I start to feel mad 
And all I can think is that I want to turn your head so bad 
And I want to turn your head so bad